Sigh.

I haven't posted for a while...

Basically, I'm scared.

This health thing has gone on too long, the doctors can't seem to fix it, and I can't leave the house without utter and total fear of having an accident in public.

Way too much blood and pain. EVERY DAY.

I'm exhausted all of the time (gee, I wonder why /sarcasm) and we have all of these plans for the future that don't really allow for so much volatility in my schedule. I mean, really, how are we supposed to go out looking at houses with this going on? I have enough trouble going in public bathrooms, can you imagine having to use the bathroom at a house for sale?

I don't want to die from this. But the fact is, I probably will. If not this round, then the next time they can't suppress my immune system and get my body to stop attacking itself.

Steriods have been suggested, but I go insane on steroids. Right now it's sort of, steroids, or Imuran?

Insane, or so immune-suppressed that a simple cold could kill me?
I think we're going to opt for the insanity, but that means my life will have to be put on hold.
I just can't picture shopping for a house while out of my mind on steroids...although, I might be great at the bargaining table...